Looking Good Can Be Better Than Being Good When It Comes To Skiing
It’s a continual mystery why people fall in love with skiing. After all, it’s nothing more than trying to get down Mount Everest on a couple of wooden boards that usually direct one right into the tree line at about Mach 3. However, at least the clothing can help one look good while crashing. So be smart; spend money on ski clothing rather than actual skiing gear.
Think about things for a minute; Alpine skiing usually involves careening like a madman down the slope and on Alpine skiing equipment that costs literally hundreds and even thousands of dollars. Now; most ski resorts rent that stuff and at a price that’s bound to be less than the three-month hospital stay that usually occurs after improper Alpine skiing is done by folks who have no business on slick wooden boards and snow.
That’s why spending the money for the rental gear and then spending the real money on the clothing that can help one look like an Olympic gold medal-winning downhill skier is probably the smarter move. Don’t worry about being laughed at while skiing all day on the bunny slope, because those peasants don’t get that their lives are in danger every second they’re on a hill higher than 2 feet.
And the first thing that a little money should be spent on is a nice black sport watch. This handy little instrument can tell all kinds of time, especially the time when the clubhouse’s happy hour is set to kick off. It’s certainly worth the equivalent of receiving endless huzzahs for having skied the tallest slope, though that was an accident that took place after having gotten on the wrong lift.
Much of this obsession with skiing is also why it’ll be a pretty smart idea to get a black helmet for wear while tumbling (which is actually the word that should be substituted for ‘skiing, ‘ in most peoples’ cases) down a slope; it’ll hide all the dents that one took to the noggin while running into other skiers and more than a few trees. The ski patrol will certainly be appreciative, at least.
There’s really no deep secret to skiing as long as one understands that it’s a sport designed to get a human as close as possible to the speed of light while wearing funny looking footboards designed to not handle icy, frozen white water crystals very well. The sport certainly seems to have been designed by some cruel god more interested in torturing the little humans through skiing than anything else, sad to say.
In the end, what’s smarter? Dropping thousands on some skiing equipment that will usually end up gathering dust after the first life-threatening ski experience or renting that gear and spending the money on some hot looking clothing? Sit in the clubhouse, look good — even if there’s no hope of being good — and bask in the warmth of a nice fire and an equally warm toddy.